What does Success REALLY mean?

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Last night, my husband and I were sitting on our back porch discussing our potential new house, careers, and what we wanted out of life. A pretty deep conversation for a Tuesday night but what can I say this house has created lots of questions for him, for me, for LB, and for our life altogether. We moved to my family's farm out in the middle of nowhere (it's really only 15 miles from downtown Charlotte) almost 2 years ago. The 5-year plan was to live there for free (lucky I know), save money, and then buy a house once LB was ready to go to kindergarten.


The Best Laid Plans

All of this has been fast forwarded because the house of my dreams came on the market 3 weeks ago. It's a beautiful old Southern mansion with white columns and exactly what I have envisioned living in since I could think about growing up and owning a home. So, we put an offer in and after some back and forth, it was accepted.  Of course, next is the home inspection which was completed last Friday.  We got the report on Monday and oh my WORD, it looked like the house was moments away from falling down and imploding based on the inspector's comments.  So now, we're waiting on estimates to see what all these repairs could potentially cost and if we can afford it.



Obviously, this is my dream so I really really want it and I am ever so fortunate that my hubs is 100% on board.  All of this, however, led him to ask me "What does success look like to you?  And you know, you might have to change what success looks like to you."  These are rather BIG questions and I was a bit taken back.  I know what success looked like to me when I was in my 20s:  married, with a little girl, live in a big house, belong to the country club, be able to travel when and where I want with my family, buy whatever clothes, books, stuff I want, have a job I enjoy, own a boat (like a 65ft yacht), and basically have tons of money.  So, for the broad strokes, my definition of success has not changed.  In fact, I've actually met quite a few of those "life goals" - I'm happily married, a mom to the sweetest little girl ever, and we're working on the house part.

BUT - what about success in my job?  I really envisioned being some sort of CEO of a company that did business in China, leading gargantuan deals, being some sort of really big high roller when I was in college and in my 20s.  I also thought I'd make $70K right out of college...that didn't happen, but I've always had these GINORMOUS dreams.  Was I letting myself down because it really doesn't seem like that is what I am destined to be?  The Answer:

I really don't know


But what I'm leaning towards is "no".  Definitions of success can change over time and they should.  Things fundamentally change as you grow older.  Some things become more important and some go by the wayside.  The older I've gotten the more I've realized A) I really just want to be independently wealthy (still haven't made this work yet) B) lots of stuff isn't happiness (just credit card debt) C) my priority really is my family, not my career.  

I am not a woman that particularly wants to stay home with my child.  There certainly are days I do and days I don't.  I really just want to provide for her the best life has to offer:  opportunities for travel and exposure, college, and so on.  Right now, my working (even if I don't love it) is the way to provide them.  I'm also hoping that blogging helps to support my life and My Why.


What is Your Why and definition of Success?

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